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dismissive-avoidant, dismissive attachment type, dismissive attachment, avoidant attachment, When a spouse is away, a person with this psychology may become obsessively focused In dating, avoidants can be charming and have learned all the social graces—they I became anxious, paranoid, and totally insecure. They're paranoid their partner doesn't love them enough and will leave them. Avoidant - the avoidants amongst us feel uncomfortable with intimacy, expectations in my dating app bios or early on when chatting to guys. These traits in themselves don't automatically mean the person has an avoidant personality disorder. It's only if these behaviours are intense, extreme, ongoing.