Dating girl 6 years older

02-19-2014, 12:18 PM

The Good

Been together for a few years and get very along well.
Excellent conversations; no awkwardness.
We enjoy same activities and are both physically active.
We both have good jobs and make about the same money.

Issues

I am 30, she's 36.
She is a little overweight and added some pounds since we met.
My parents are against it. Social taboos.

It is "decision time" and I am quite nervous. I'm trying to think through all circumstances in my head. I have read other threads about older woman/younger man relationships, but those usually focus on age gaps of 10 years or so. I am in the in-between zone where we really don't feel a huge difference now. But will this be a problem later? I gaze over at younger women, but I feel like this is something that all men must cope with when they settle down, regardless of their wife's age. In addition, I have been with a more physically attractive younger woman in a prior relationship and we were totally incompatible on a personal level, so the physical attraction there died quickly.

Bottom line question: Do I just need to suck it up and accept that marriage is against human biology, or is the fact that my gf 6 years older present serious additional problems? Again, day-to-day, we are great together. Any helpful perspective here is appreciated.

02-19-2014, 12:23 PM

I'm against first post, put a match to the kindling, threads myself.

02-19-2014, 12:26 PM

Why is the age difference listed under "Issues"? Seems like your parents are the issue, not her age by itself, since you don't have a problem with it. Or...do you? 6 years is nothing. The reason you don't feel a huge difference is that there isn't one.

I think you need to sit down and come up with a more extensive list under "The Good". There's gotta be more than must good convos & enjoying the same activities, getting along well. You make it sound like you've been dating for a few months, and are trying to decide whether to make it exclusive, not living together for years and trying to decide whether to pop the question.

If that's all you can come up with, the answer would be "no".

02-19-2014, 12:52 PM

You seem terribly immature, even for 30. Seriously, you're looking at marrying this woman and you're worrying about your parents not approving? Are you still dependent on them or something? Or is she abusive and that's why they (quite logically) disapprove?

You don't seem that into her either. I get along with a lot of guys. I have GREAT conversations with a lot of guys. Doesn't mean I want to marry them. You're also getting cranky about a woman gaining "a few" pounds as she approaches 40. That happens, but you also say you're both physically active so obviously it's not going to get out of control.

I'm a year older than your girlfriend and not really into the whole biological clock thing, but she's got a limited time if that's on her to-do list. And here you sit dithering after 6 years. Cut her loose so neither of you waste anymore time