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Vancouver's Asian men fear women prefer white guys
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Many East Asian men lack a firm identity and are “emotionally stunted,” said Lee, a Simon Fraser University graduate who was born in east Vancouver after his parents moved to Canada from Hong Kong in the 1970s.
Many Asian men veer back and forth between relational extremes, Lee said. On one hand, many shyly fear they’re seen as “geeks.” On the other, they jump in to the dating scene with “false bravado” and unrealistic fantasies.
Many Asian men have unhelpful expectations of meeting either “mother figures” or “beauties,” Lee said. They run up against Asian and other women looking for “someone to take care of them.” Things often don’t click.
In Metro Vancouver, which has the highest rate of mixed-race relationships in Canada (nine per cent), Lee said he has been in three serious partnerships — two with Chinese women and one with a Caucasian.
Generally, Lee joins many others in maintaining that Metro Vancouver, compared with other major cities in North America and Europe, “is the hardest place to get a date for anyone.”
Many Metro men and women are so individualistic and “into doing their own thing” that they haven’t learned the art of flirting and connecting with potential partners.
In other words, the advice that Lee offers his predominantly East Asian male clients and friends for improving their relationship skills could apply to people of any ethnicity or gender in dating-challenged Metro.
Tip one: Truly listen to and appreciate the person you are meeting.
Tip two: Understand and convey what’s special about you.
Tip three: Trust it when you feel the “chemistry.”
(Feature photo by Sodanie Chea)
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Twitter.com/@douglastodd
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